You Gotta be Hungry

I’m experiencing a nasty seasonal depression.  I don’t know why. This is the year that an entire generation of my family officially died (less my mother) but it isn’t tragic. The world may be run by Toilet Babies but I’m still making money. And I actually tend to lose weight when I’m depressed so I should be happy.

Nah, fuck it. Shit sucks.

A few months back I had a run in with a feral cat at my place of employment. I’m an admitted cat lover, and dog lover. So when a feral showed up at my workplace with four kittens, I sprung into action and called a wonderful local rescue who graciously trapped and re-homed the kittens on the condition that the mother would be trapped as well and spayed. I would pay for the spay but they would not be able to find a home for the mother and she would be released right back where she was trapped. Fair enough.

My workplace is next to a huge apartment complex and there are strays and ferals about. I know of a few odd feral colonies here in the big city…around railroad tracks and by commercial docks. Most people that live in cities are happy enough to have the cats around to keep the vermin down. Or at least I thought….

My boss took issue with my allowing the feral to exist and threatened to call animal control unless I did something. No “hey, thanks for all of the extra work you did to get rid of the four other future cats…” that would be too much to ask. I steeled myself and stated that I was not comfortable with calling animal control and would like to attempt to trap the cat myself.

I got the trap from the SPCA and instructed my coworkers not to feed the cat because if I was going to trap her, she needed to be hungry. Of course, I’m only at work 8 hours a day and every time I came in for my shift, the food was out for the cat because people can’t not feed things or follow simple instructions.

We feed everything when we shouldn’t.  No matter how many people are told NOT to feed geese and ducks bread,  I see people everywhere feeding geese and ducks bread! It’s almost like they follow me around (to be fair, I go to a lot of places with geese and ducks–I’m hardcore like that). It’s not what they eat—it fucks up their digestion—they live in the wild without a “starducks” just fine so leave them alone!

At my last job as a guardian, I would have to explain to people with a dying family member that people in the dying process don’t need to eat.  In fact, people often lose the ability to swallow so by force feeding them, you’re more likely to make them choke and then aspirate on food. But people wouldn’t listen. “you’re not eating!” they plead with their dying mother….Oh, People!

Eventually, another coworker became unglued at the cat and yelled at me about it so I decided that I needed to take extreme measures. I threw away the cat food that was put out and instead of regular wet cat food in the cat trap, I used sardines. The cat was hungry enough and I had her in a trap less than 5 minutes after the food was put out for her.

Now this cat is in my garage. My husband and I have built her a sturdy shelter (thanks internet for the suggestions) and in a few days, we will have her living outside just as she was.

To get anything done, from catching a cat to getting over depression, you have to want it. You have to be a little hungry. I’m not ready to give up on my depression just yet or the cat apparently.

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